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 And the Oscar Goes to . . .

HumorBy Harris Brio

In an epic that just will not end, called 'The Administration,' we notice great acting as well as bad performances. Despite all the theatrics, there are some award winners. Actors can make a plot come alive or just kill it. So, without any further dilly-dally let the judgements commence.

Baby George played by George Bush maniacally had a plane to crash, and he crashed it in a jungle - the concrete jungle. Managing to stay alive, he was adopted by a wise ape played by Dick Cheney. Ape Cheney taught many a thing to baby George, but the most important was the Cheney protocol.

Baby George was an eager learner. He had to be in order to survive in the jungle. Through diligent study of the Protocol of Cheney, Baby George learned:

Blessed are the Liberals, represented by the gazelles.
Blessed are they for the Liberals just run.
Graze on grass and become prey to hyenas and other ravaging animals.
One ravaging animal in particular - the boar, played by Rush Limbaugh...

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Limbaugh’s acting was mediocre, at best. Rumor has it that Limbaugh’s drug addiction was the reason. Hollywood insiders will tell you Limbaugh is a poor actor. Casting agents say Limbaugh is just very cheaply available and doesn’t need a lot of rehearsals when playing a boor.

As the movie progresses, George finally learns a few tricks. Furnishing himself with many items stole from here and there. George manages to secure the love interest of an US noblewoman, played by Condilezza Rice. Condilezza, known for her hysterical and outlandish theatrical performances, seemed to have great trouble portraying nobility.

Condilezza Rice and George Bush just couldn’t pull off romance or love - there just wasn’t any chemistry between them. She seemed over-anxious to finish every scene quickly, some say to indulge in her fetish for alligator shoes, and to fulfill the need to buy a new pair daily.

Ms. Rice meets our hero George, while on shoe buying safaris. Having never met a girl before George believes she is some kind of odd boy. But the story-line prevails, so naturally he takes her into the jungle to live with him.

He slowly learns the rules of mimicking human relationship. After learning basic human speech patterns from the US noble woman, she takes George to the US.

George’s introductions to America scenes are filled with the typical savage meets world experiences and antics.

George reads a book upside down, showing he can't actually read. Then George has trouble with knives and forks. In a slapstick-like routine, George yells out to the semi-European nobility, played by Tony “the poodle” Blair, “Yo!” Throughly knee-slapping hilarity.

Troubling times begin and the plot thickens in the new surroundings.

One of George’s old friends, a Toucan played by Jerry Falwel, flies far and wide searching for George. The toucan offers information on a disaster looming on the horizon. A mad and angry gorilla has threatened George’s father.

Poor George has to convince civilized humans that an over-grown gorilla, played by Saddam Hussein, has acquired a means to their end. George has to hurriedly lay out a plan to end the gorilla’s quest for global domination. Unfortunately George lacks communication skills to adequately relay his concerns. In a gut-busting scene, George is forced to bang way like an enraged chimpanzee to show his frustrations with civilization. All the while keeping up the farce of being well-spoken.

During that hilarious scene, George begins to stumble between human speech and jungle talk. He not only confused himself, but others around him as well. The scene perfectly portrayed a drunk asking for loose change in order to buy some more poison.

What good would a movie be without a loyal sidekick? Introducing Colin Powell.

A very well acted scene was that of Mr. Powell giving a stirring speech, at a gathering of the civilized. Colin begs the attendees to believe savage George. Namely because George is too much of a simpleton to tell a lie. A definite misty-eye causing performance.

Will George panic and return to the jungle, where he belongs, clad in his underoos and Tony Lama cowboy boots? Or will he stay and take civilization into the jungle.

The Oscar should naturally go to George, but the gorilla’s performance, as a crazed and lunatic, world-dominating beast was acted out well enough to deserve my vote.

Many would say the best supporting award should go to Condilezza Rice. I, on the other hand, award it to Colin Powell, because without his speech the Administration would not have been the show it is.

Credit should also go to the media special effects teams, such as MSNBC, for making the abeyant gorilla look incredibly like a threatening snake, played by Osama bin Laden.


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"And the Oscar Goes to . . ." | Login/Create an Account | 6 comments | Search Discussion
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Re: And the Oscar Goes to . . . (Score: 1)
by Lavender on Sunday, November 12 @ 11:34:09 EST
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That's insanely funny! Thank you for the lovely Oscar Awards show I do so appreciate it! I am thinking a broadway musical show in NYC...What do you think? I know its sick and twisted but then so are they. So i think it is quite fitting indeed!

Re: And the Oscar Goes to . . . (Score: 1)
by FrogDaddy on Wednesday, November 15 @ 19:43:21 EST
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Good stuff here Harris ! Wonderful writing. George being adopted by a wise ape really set the scene :-) .... well done. Bravo to you

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