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 Rants: Stupid Is As Stupid Does

ArtBy Ray Lemire


People who pay attention to political endorsements from rock & roll stars should really stop to consider the source. Take a peek inside and you’ll get a feel for the mindsets that rock your world – and maybe the next time you hear a rock star endorse a candidate or a cause, you’ll hopefully think twice before blindly following them.

By the way, we realize some of the people mentioned inside are dead. That doesn't make what they said any less idiotic but it does mean they won't be making any additional stupid statements. It's the ones who are still living you should worry about.

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Ted Nugent: “Having a hundred girls isn’t any different from one girl, except I like it a whole lot better.”

Roger Waters: “You go through this thing where you think of all the good you could do by giving the money away. But, in the end, you decide to keep it.”

Tommy Ramone: “We really like people who hate us.”

David Lee Roth: “Women are great. When they dig you, there’s nothing they won’t do. That kind of loyalty is hard to find – unless you’ve got a good dog.”

Posh Spice: “I’ve never in my life succeeded in reading a book from cover to cover.”

Michael Jackson: “I’ve only read two books in my life: the Bible and Peter Pan.”

Diana Ross: “Sometimes I can’t believe how lucky I am to be me. I could have been just an average person but I’m Diana Ross. ”

Bono: “You read about the excesses of the rock-and-roll stars of the 1970s – driving Rolls-Royces into swimming pools. Well, that’s better than polishing them.”

Neil Diamond: “My attitude, in purely intellectual terms, was ‘screw you.’”

James Brown: “Hair is the first thing. And teeth the second. Hair and teeth. A man got those two things he’s got it all.”

David Bowie: “Adolph Hitler was the first pop star. I think he was quite as good as [Mick] Jagger.”

Steven Tyler: “I must have snorted all of Peru.”

John Lennon: “Ringo doesn’t know the meaning of fear, or any other word with more than three letters.”

Paul McCartney: “Starvation in India doesn’t worry me a bit. Not one iota. And it doesn’t worry you, if you’re honest. You just pose. You don’t even know it exists. You’ve just seen the charity ads. You can’t pretend to me that an ad reaches down into the depths of your soul and actually makes you feel more for those people than, for instance, you feel about getting a new car.”

Donna Summer: “Sometimes I get bored riding down the beautiful streets of L.A. I know it sounds crazy but I just want to go to New York and see people suffer.”

Cyndi Lauper: “The ramifications of death are final.”

Axl Rose: “I can’t get enough of women. I have sex as often as possible. It’s really hard to maintain a one-on-one relationship if the other person is not going to allow me to be with other people.”

Yoko Ono: “If I was a Jewish girl in Hitler’s day, I would become his girlfriend. After ten days in bed, he would come to my way of thinking.”

Boy George: “Bill Clinton’s gorgeous. I’d love to sleep with him.”

Mick Jagger: “When I was thirteen, all I desperately wanted to do was have sex. I did it with boys at school. I think that’s true of almost every boy.”

Bill Wyman: “I think a tour makes it easy on a chick. She doesn’t have to bother putting the make on anyone. She’s just there to say yes.”

Carly Simon: ”I’ve never bought the open marriage thing. I’ve never seen it work. But that doesn’t mean I believe in monogamy. Sleeping with someone else doesn’t necessarily constitute an infidelity.”

Marvin Gaye: “I feel I’m as good as Beethoven or any of the other greats.”

John Denver: “I epitomize America. I can do anything. One of these days I’ll be so complete I won’t be a human. I’ll be a god.”

Tom Jones: “I don’t like Bob Dylan. I don’t like his attitude or his records. All that protest thing was a load of rubbish. I don’t hate listening to his records but I can’t stand it when people say he’s a genius.”

Bob Dylan: “Sonny and Cher are a drag. A guy gets kicked out of a restaurant and he went home and wrote a song about it.”

Lou Reed: “Frank Zappa is probably the single most untalented person I’ve heard in my life. He’s a two-bit, pretentious academic and he can’t play his way out of anything.”

Sid Vicious: “I wouldn’t piss on [Keith Richards] if he were on fire.”

Brian Wilson: “When I hear birds singing, I think, ‘Is that me?’”

k.d. lang: “I have a little bit of penis envy. They’re cool.”

Mickey Dolenz: “To all those who criticized, condemned, berated, lambasted, denounced, defamed, defiled, or otherwise desecrated the Monkees – go fuck yourselves.”

Elton John: ”I just think that people should be very free with sex. They should draw the line at goats.”

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